Zora Neale Hurston said, “There are years that ask questions, and years that answer them.” That’s how I’d describe my motherhood journey. For years, I wondered if motherhood would happen for me.
The questions became more painful after a miscarriage nearly 10 years ago in 2016. And then again a year later. I had always assumed getting pregnant would just happen. My grandmother had six children, my mom had three with no problems. Why not me? But I had to learn something important: every body is different.
What I didn’t have back then was the right care team. After my first miscarriage, the doctor didn’t offer comfort. He simply said we’d schedule a D&C and that I’d be fine. But I wasn’t fine. Miscarriage is both physical and emotional. After my second miscarriage, I gave up. I told myself maybe motherhood just wasn’t meant for me, and I stopped trying for five years.
Then the pandemic happened, and for the first time I slowed down. I started asking myself how I could actually care for my body. Because of my PCOS, I learned that inflammation and insulin resistance were working against me. I began changing how I lived by cooking more, following an anti-inflammatory diet, drinking less, sleeping earlier, and finally honoring my body instead of pushing through everything.
Slowly, things began to shift. I found the right supplements and built a stronger care team. I did get pregnant. And now, nearly ten years later, I’m pregnant with my second child and due in just a few weeks.
The journey wasn’t easy, but everything changed when I started investing in my health and giving my body the support it needed. One thing I’ve also learned: preparing for pregnancy isn’t just about you. Your partner’s health matters too.
So if you’re in the thick of it right now and feeling discouraged but longing to become a mother, please know this: Life can look completely different years later. Transformation is possible!